i'm here. really? no way...

i would be completely lying to you if I said that I cant believe that I am actually here. Am I glad to be here? I'm not quite sure yet but the future looks a bit promising.

as i boarded the plane from JFK to LA on Thursday afternoon, I teared up walking down the ramp onto the plane just leaving my mom. this was no ordinary departure, rather a departure from things known and comfortable. You would think that after being accustomed to leaving my parents for the past 6 years, it would be no problem for me this time. But this time, there was something different. There was the acknowledgment that I was no longer an hour or 5 hour drive away, but rather I was going to be a 18 hour plane ride around the world. my parents have realized this for the past 4 months while I have been deciding and preparing for this journey, but it wasn't until I was on my way down that ramp and on that plane seated with my carry-ons in stow and my book on my lap, that it finally clicked to me the absolute ridiculousness of what I was getting ready to do.

i began to tell myself that it was too late to turnback because i had begged my parents for this opportunity, and there was no way that I was going to go back...but then there was this feeling of doubt that I wasn't really ready for this journey. i doubted my level of responsibility. i doubted my ability to travel alone. i doubted my ability to live in another country. i doubted me. however, amidst this doubt i also realized that there was no way to turn back. as the plane began to reverse slowly in preparing for departure, i knew that this was it. i'm going and i cant go back now.

LAX. thank god for siobhan. i don't know if i would be able to make this journey without knowing that she was in it with me all the way. as we met up in LA, i think we both realized that finality of our decisions but we assured each other that this opportunity was worth the adventure. i'm so glad that Cavy came to see me at the airport even if we only got to talk for 5 minutes. just her being there for those 5 minutes, to see a familiar face and to give me something to work towards (for crew) while i'm away was perfect. it was the perfect way for me realize that everyone will still be here when i get back, so this is something that i need to do.

QANTAS AIRWAYS is definitely the way to fly, if you want to visit. basically, each person has their own personal on demand TV, in which you can watch whatever newly released movie, random tv show, play a game or listen to music. it was AWESOME. so besides friday not existing for me and me sleeping for probably 8-10 hours on the flight, i watched the 300, music & lyrics, 2 episodes of House and 2 episodes of Everybody loves raymond. gosh it was a sweet flight. after those 18 hours from LAX to Auckland, New Zealand we deboarded the plane to stretch our legs, call home and see what the Auckland airport had to offer. it was a pretty airport but thats all i really have about that.

landing in melbourne australia. i think siobhan summed it up best when she said, "well, it definitely looks like Australia". as we descended into melbourne, you could see the beauty that the land of australia behold. you could see the city scape on the briskly 38 degree winter Melbourne morning. you could however not see any kangaroos, but hopefully they will come soon. ;) but i still couldn't believe i was there. really? its still pretty surreal that i'm completely across the world. even as tonight when we finally met most of our group and began to get acquainted with each other, it still doesn't feel like i'm here. perhaps the jetlag has something to do with this subreality that i am currently undertaking. perhaps.

tomorrow we leave for the Grampings which is our IES program's 3 day orientation trip. it looks like its going to be a lot of fun and i'm really excited about it; however, slightly saddened because originally we were supposed to go to Phillips Island to see the Penguins, Koalas and seals but I guess I will just have to make that trip on my separate time. The Grampings is one of the state of Victoria's hidden treasures but before we get there, we are stopping for lunch to have a wine tasting...jealous much? siobhan was very excited about this, as you can imagine. so hopefully, after these few days exploring some of the beauty of australia i will have many many pictures to show for and will be closer to the realization that i am actually here. until then...g'day mate! haha...